WHEN I WAS 21

When I was 21, it was a very good year…

But now the days are short, I’m in the autumn of my years

And now I think of my life as vintage wine
From fine old kegs
From the brim to the dregs
It poured sweet and clear
It was a very good year

[songwriter: ervin drake]
[sung by frank sinatra]

October 31, 2025 – on this day I celebrate the 60th anniversary of my 21st birthday.

I don’t often use a secular quote to begin my posts, but the significance of this birthday made for a compelling exception.

When I was twenty-one, with apologies to Frank Sinatra, it was a very good year.

I was in my senior year of college, my last semester on campus as I would be student teaching at an area high school in the spring. So, I filled my schedule with a bunch of elective classes, determined to coast through the sixteen remaining weeks with as little effort as possible.

But my complacency was rewarded with stunning disappointment.

From my second semester of my freshman year, I had made the Dean’s List. Back in those days, the local weekly newspaper in the town where we lived published the achievements of its residents, which meant that my name would appear in print twice a year for everyone to admire. All who knew me would marvel and my mother to beam with pride. My head would swell as I drank in the compliments.

That senior semester was, for me, an academic disaster. Not only did I miss the Dean’s list, but my grades were also so low that my overall GPA (grade point average) fell below 3.0, and I would not graduate with honors.

Talk about a wakeup call!

At this point, you’d expect to read that from that point on, I had learned my lesson and would apply myself diligently so as not to repeat my slothful ways. Well…not so fast.

The intervening sixty years have been a cycle of similar patterns of behavior. I would do well for a while until my smugness, ever lurking beneath the surface, would rear its ugly head, and I would once again fall short of a goal that I’d set, and end up kicking myself in frustration. I would promise myself to do better but end up with familiar results. Wash, rinse, repeat.

It calls to mind the words of the Apostle Paul: “I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” (Romans 7:15)

Yet despite my repeated lapses and blunders, God has given me the grace to stumble, fumble, and bumble my way through life without catastrophic consequences.

Each year on this day I write a reflective piece on my life and how it has evolved over the years. I begin my morning by reading Psalm 90, and specifically, verses 10 and 12, which have been guideposts for me.

The span of our life is seventy years,
perhaps in strength even eighty;
    yet the sum of them is but labor and sorrow,
    for they pass away quickly and we are gone.

So teach us to number our days
    that we may apply our hearts to wisdom.

This twelfth verse is a haunting reminder that a life lived with meaning and purpose has significant value.

As I was approaching seventy, my goal was to live long enough to reach eighty.

A year ago, on October 29, I underwent hip replacement surgery. Before the surgery, I was a little nervous that something might go wrong and I would die two days short of celebrating my 80th birthday.

It was a silly fear, I admit, but I was motivated by the feeling that there was still more to be done, and I was still on a quest to make a difference. Despite the roller coaster that has been my life, I still felt I had more to contribute.

It has taken me a lifetime to come to that realization.

And here I am at 81. Eighty-one! Just writing and reading that number sounds so strange…at the same time, wonderful!

As a gambler would say on a good day at the casino, “I’m playing with house money!”
(I’m not a gambler, but that image was too vivid to ignore.)

I have so much to be thankful for: the good health that I’ve enjoyed for the most part, the infinite number of family, friends, and relationships that have enriched my life, the places I’ve been and the wonders I’ve witnessed.

But chiefly, I’m thankful for the grace that God has shown me as I’ve wandered along this earthly journey. And, believe me, it has all been grace!

I close with the final four verses from Psalm 90. Although they are presented as a petition of sorts, I can confirm that my life is a testament to the fact that God fulfills God’s promises and these blessings have been fulfilled in, with, and through me.

            Satisfy us by your loving-kindness in the morning;
    so shall we rejoice and be glad all the days of our life.

            Make us glad by the measure of the days that you afflicted us
    and the years in which we suffered adversity.

            Show your servants your works
    and your splendor to their children.

            May the graciousness of the LORD our God be upon us;
    prosper the work of our hands;
    prosper our handiwork.

And pardon how self-serving this may sound, but this day I will pray for myself the birthday prayer (#50) found on page 830 of the Book of Common Prayer.

O God, our times are in your hand: Look with favor, we pray, on your servant Abraham as he begins another year. Grant that he may grow in wisdom and grace, and strengthen his trust in your goodness all the days of his life; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.